Secrets to Vegas:
Play Time
Scary rides:
You've all heard Las Vegas referred to as an adult playground. For
those of us who are denying our adulthood, the casino developers
have been kind enough to create mini-theme parks. The most
raved-about roller coaster is the Manhattan Express at New
York-New York, which costs $8. Expect lots of twists, loops, dives
and inversions at about 67 miles per hour. Although it's not a
roller coaster, the Big Shot at the Stratosphere gets high marks
for scariness. Imagine being strapped into a chair 1,000 feet
above the ground, then being launched 160 feet up a tower in two
seconds. We recommend riding at night, so try to keep your eyes
open for the spectacular view. Oh yeah, and go to the bathroom
first! The first ride on the Big Shot costs $10, which includes
admission to the Stratosphere Tower. Once you're in, additional
rides are only $3 apiece.
Free attractions:
Las Vegas offers free drinks when you gamble, free lounge acts,
free parking and a few free attractions. MGM-Mirage Resorts has
made an art of outdoor exhibits with the Battle of Buccaneer Bay
at Treasure Island, the Volcano at the Mirage and the Fountains at
the Bellagio. The Rio's Masquerade Village offers a "Show in
the Sky" that features live music, singing, dancing, stilt
walkers and colorful costumes. This is where everyone gets those
metallic beaded necklaces you've been seeing around town. Most
observers watch the elaborate show for free, but if you really
want to join the fun, pay $9.95, get in costume and party
alongside the performers. Next, for the mushy, sentimental (but
they really are cute) attraction, visit the MGM Grand's Lion
Habitat. The multilevel viewing area allows you to see several
lions and cubs in a lush environment. Admission is free, but if
you can't resist getting your picture taken with a lion, that will
cost you $20.
Seal your finances:
Perhaps you're not one of those people who will take advantage of
the $10 million chip at the Aladdin, and you need to budget your
millions. May we suggest individual envelopes for each day in
Vegas? Separate your gambling rations into the envelopes, and once
they're gone (if they are, of course) you can head out to dinner,
a show, shopping or just sightseeing. We hear there's a lot to see
in Vegas.
Attention gambling virgins:
Don't be ashamed. We all can remember that awkward first-time
feeling. When you initially sit down at a table, perhaps for a
game of blackjack, do yourself a favor -- take lessons if the
casino offers them. If lessons aren't available, spend a couple of
bucks on the crib card that supplies the basics. When all else
fails, ask questions. The dealers are there to help -- and most of
the time they're happy to do so. Just watch out for those showy
gamblers sitting next to you who seem more than helpful. The
dealers are the only true professionals at the table.
It adds up to real money:
Coins in a bucket or chips in your hands seem more like play money
than the real thing. But it is real, folks -- and unfortunately,
there are people out there who would love to separate you from it.
Our advice is to keep your change buckets close and your chips
even closer. If your winnings become too heavy to lug around, be
sure to make use of the hotel safe. By the by, we recommend
against the Demi Moore-in-"Indecent Proposal" method of
throwing the money on the bed and rolling around in it. You may
lose some, and besides, you don't know where that money's been.
Free cigars, you say:
The next time you're passing time at the tables or machines and
ordering those free drinks, don't forget to ask for a free cigar.
Several hotels have been known to keep some of those trendy little
incendiary devices on hand for just such an occasion. It's still
recommended that you tip the cocktail waitress.
Chocolate and cacti?
No, it doesn't make sense to us either, but there it is: the Ethel
M Chocolates Factory and Botanical Garden, which resides in nearby
Henderson. Tour the factory for free, sample a piece of chocolate
at the end of the tour (buy more candy if you can't resist), then
tour the botanical garden, which houses some of the desert's most
precious species.
Simulator rides:
Just as there are several different types of hotels in Las Vegas,
there are also several different kinds of magic motion rides. The
Luxor offers "In Search of the Obelisk," which is
probably the highest-impact simulator ride in town and costs only
$6, competing with Excalibur's "Merlin's Magic Motion
Machines," which costs $4. The most expensive ride for the
experience is "Race for Atlantis" at the Forum Shops. At
$9.50, it seemed the ride could have lasted a bit longer. For true
Trekkies, "Star Trek: The Experience" is a must. For
$24.99 (visitors), $19.99 (NV residents), you'll see Star Trek
costumes and props on display prior to riding on an out-of-control
ship. And for something completely different, at the Sahara's
Cyber Speedway you sit in a real Indy car and "drive"
through the streets of Las Vegas at 220 miles per hour. This
virtual reality ride is a great way to get rid of road rage for
only $8 to $10.
Quick Bellagio fountain quiz:
It's 8 on a Saturday night, you're on the sidewalk in front of the
Paris Las Vegas and suddenly the Fountains at the Bellagio beckon.
You (a) run as fast as you can across the street hoping you didn't
miss a drop; (b) stay where you are and enjoy the show from there;
or (c) look for the nearest crosswalk, knowing that if you missed
anything, the show starts all over again in a mere 15 minutes.
This safety tip brought to you by the staff at Vegas.com. Because
we care about your well-being (and your gambling dollars).
Botanical Conservatory:
Don't just walk by the Bellagio and admire the fountains. Make
sure to go inside and see the Bellagio's Botanical Conservatory,
gorgeous any time of the year. The arrangements change based on
the season or holiday, including groups of flowers that appeared
to explode for the Fourth of July and a Christmas tree designed by
Martha Stewart; you need to go back each time you visit. One
caveat: Children younger than 18 cannot enter Bellagio unless
accompanied by adults who are guests of the hotel (or who have
reservations at one of the restaurants).
Getting away from the Strip:
If you're renting a car or plan on taking a tour and want proof
that people actually do live in Las Vegas -- and not in hotels --
take a drive to the Red Rock Canyon Loop. Heading west on
Charleston Boulevard, you'll drive for 30 to 45 minutes past local
businesses and homes before you arrive. A $5 fee per car will get
you onto the 13-mile scenic drive through Red Rock Canyon, and
it's definitely worth the price of admission. You can also drive
out past Red Rock to the Spring Mountain Ranch, a great place to
picnic. The ranch also charges a $5-per-car entrance fee.
Pyramid scheme:
We would rather be on the Luxor hotel-casino's attractions floor
(702-262-4555), even at this very moment. The IMAX Theatre changes
movies every few months and past features have included a
biography of Michael Jordan, a 3-D exploration of the Galapagos,
Cyberworld 3-D and All Access. The "In Search of the
Obelisk" motion simulator ride is blessed by counterculture
poet S. A. Griffin's deliciously campy performance as Dr. Osiris.
The "King Tut's Tomb" attraction is better than it has
any right to be. And best of all, there's a two-story arcade with
air hockey tables. Air hockey, man!
Get out there:
Arriving before check-in time at your Vegas hotel should be the
least of your worries. If you arrive early and your hotel doesn't
allow early check-in, grab what necessities you may need for the
next couple of hours, drop your bags off with the bellman and be
on your way. With so much to do here, don't waste your time in the
lobby. Even if it's the most beautiful lobby you've ever seen.
Strip club confidential:
Want to enjoy one of Las Vegas' strip clubs and all that entails?
It's not as easy as finding your way to a club and waving a dollar
at the nearest femme fatale. There are simple rules of conduct to
be adhered to. Follow them, and you'll look less like the two-bit
heel that you are.
- Dress codes: Some of the more
upscale joints require shirts with collars -- and they must be
tucked in. Others permit untucked shirts or t-shirts, but no
shorts. The general rule is common sense; after all, you're
going to be surrounded by beautiful women, so you should at
least look the part. Come in looking like a bum, and they'll
give you the bum's rush.
- Door charges: The fact is that
most strip clubs increase their door charge during convention
season. Still, a large group of well-behaved and well-dressed
patrons arriving together could conceivably quietly approach
the doorman and bargain their way past this cover fee,
especially if they arrive early (7-8 p.m.) and order drinks
immediately.
- Hands off: Perhaps you've heard
tales of wild and reckless abandon taking place in Las Vegas
striptease clubs, or perhaps you've seen the patently
ridiculous "Showgirls." Either way, you must
understand this: these women are, no matter what it may seem
like, working. Keep your hands to yourself, and you'll avoid a
kick in the groin or a bouncer's meaty shove. Leaving the
grinding to the gals will result in a better lap dance anyway.
- Tipping: Like the saying goes,
it ain't a city in China. These womens work for tips and tips
alone. That means: (a) Don't go into a strip club with barely
enough dough to cover a round of drinks; (b) Don't look
repeatedly at a dancer working her stuff without walking up
and tipping her; and (c) Do not, under any circumstances, take
up at stageside seating without a pocketful of dollars. How
much will you need for a night? If you are an average drinker,
figure at least $30 per hour for a drink or two and stage
tipping; lap dances go for $20 each, so add that on if you
think you'll find the woman of your dreams (you will, so add
it on now).
- Prostitution: 100 percent
illegal in Clark County. Don't solicit, suggest dinner or ask
for a date; these women are dancers, not hookers. And there's
an even chance you may be soliciting an undercover cop.
Remember: nothing smells worse than
desperation. Just have fun!
Arrive in style:
Your flight made it to McCarran, you claimed your bags, now you're
ready to travel to the hotel. You look around at the hotel
shuttles, the buses, the taxis, and then you notice the limo.
Wouldn't it be great to drive up to your hotel in style? For a
mere $4 per person, several limousine companies offer hotel
shuttle service. You may have to share a ride with other people,
but you probably need to brush up on your conversational skills
anyway.
The Rio Grande:
If you're tired of spending all your time on the Strip and have
heard so much about the Rio hotel, don't walk there, especially
when the temperature is 115 degrees. A free shuttle travels from
Harrah's to the Rio, and you don't have to be a guest of either
hotel.
Lower table limits:
Still trying to find your way around the tables, and feeling
intimidated by the high table limits on the Strip? Head for
downtown Vegas. The table limits for craps, pai-gow poker and
"let it ride" are usually lower, so your learning curve
won't cost you too much. Oh, and don't forget to order up a $1.50
shrimp cocktail just try not to spill cocktail sauce on the
tables.
Player's clubs:
Stand in line, get the form and sign up for the frequent gambler
card at your favorite hotels. Use the card to accumulate points,
since you'll probably be gambling anyway, and perhaps receive
something free. It helps to be on the mailing list for a lot of
hotels. Who knows, they might pick you for a special room rate or
decide to send you tickets to a free show.
24 hours:
It's easy to become spoiled by living in Vegas, where most
businesses stay open late or even 24 hours. It's a shock when we
travel and can't get dinner past 9 p.m., or when we see gas
stations that actually close. So, while you're here, eat
when you want or grab a Big Gulp at 3 a.m. just because you can!
If you're looking to wind down after a show, an especially
wonderful spot to hang out and grab a cocktail or dessert is the
Peppermill across from the Stardust hotel-casino. The lounge and
coffee shop are open 24 hours a day. Even with restorations, the
Peppermill still has that Old Vegas feeling.
Maxed out:
A visit to the Luxor IMAX Theatre (702-262-4000) is strongly
recommended. Since 1970, IMAX has presented what it touts as the
Ultimate Film Experience: a really, really big screen with a
really, really loud sound system. Can't argue with that! The Luxor
IMAX screen is 68 feet tall by 84 feet wide, and the eight-channel
sound system boosts 15,000 watts of sound -- more than enough to
curl your toes. Although the artistic value of IMAX films varies
wildly, the medium itself will rock you.
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